Readings:
Genesis 32
Genesis 33
Matthew 12
Proverbs 2
As Jacob is losing to God’s call for him to return to his father’s land, and as he begins following in obedience, he comes to a place where things look very bad. His brother who he has deceived is coming at him with an army of 400. soldiers.
How often when our life is interrupted by a message from the Lord, it looks like obeying the Lord God is going to be costly or dangerous or end badly for us!
But let’s look at how Jacob wrestles with his fear and doubt in this situation. He knows that he has wronged his brother, so if something bad happens to him and his family at the hands of his brother — he might even understand that might be just discipline from the Lord to teach him a lesson about deceiving others. In fact, since he has been on a journey for about 20 years being deceived and cheated by his father in law, he might understand better how it was wrong how he treated his brother!
How many times have I faced pain and consequences for my own foolish actions that I had been able to delay or avoid by stating on my prodigal path? How many opportunities for reconciliation have I avoided fearfully?
Jacob wrestles with the Lord asking, But God you promised…” like a child reminding their parents of a trip to get a special dessert after dinner. I wonder how many times we misunderstand the promises of God because His ways are higher than our ways, and His perspective is all of eternity and not just “this moment of discomfort”?
Genesis 32:11-12 NLT
O Lord, please rescue me from the hand of my brother, Esau. I am afraid that he is coming to attack me, along with my wives and children. But you promised me, ‘I will surely treat you kindly, and I will multiply your descendants until they become as numerous as the sands along the seashore—too many to count.’”
And Jacob doesn’t demonstrate great courage here. We can see how he tries to compartmentalize what is most important to him here, in how he puts what he is most willing to be sacrificed “if necessary” out front:
Genesis 32:20-21 NLT
And be sure to say, ‘Look, your servant Jacob is right behind us.’” Jacob thought, “I will try to appease him by sending gifts ahead of me. When I see him in person, perhaps he will be friendly to me.” So the gifts were sent on ahead, while Jacob himself spent that night in the camp.
Isn’t this so true of how we too can try to bargain with God and wrestle with Him over the things that we hold most dear in our hearts?
And then we see that through the night, this struggle against God that we see playing out (as he stays behind and sends everything and everyone ahead of him towards Esau’s) culminated in a wrestling match with this man where he would not give up on receiving the blessing.
Doesn’t this remind us of Jacob clinging to Esau’s heal at birth? His finding a way to cheat Esau out of the birthright with some soup? His refusing to give up on getting Rachel after being tricked?
How often does Jacob seek to “make it happen” by his own cunning and striving? And Jacob, now called Israel, will walk with a limp for the rest of his life, because instead of trusting God to do what He has promised — he is continuing to insist on trying to earn it, to capture it, to “do it on my own”.
How often do we foolishly try and do it or own way instead of surrendering to trust God’s perfect plan and purpose? How often do we bring on ourselves so much unnecessary pain and suffering?
This is what sin does to us — it robs us and hurts us and others because we’re trying to trade God’s way for our own. We might be led to consider “but what if Jacob did X instead of Y”. But no, this is who Jacob is in his flesh. And this is who we are in our flesh. Our flesh opposes God. Even mature Christian Paul (in Romans 7:7-25) speaks about how the law of God reveals to us the sin that is embedded in our flesh.
I wonder what we are “holding back” from trusting God with fully today?
But instead of just asking this to be shamed, it might be best that we ask it so that we can clearly see the sin in our flesh that is holding us back from God’s call and purpose. So that then we might call upon the name of Jesus, the great healer and physician to do supernatural surgery and remove this sin, this cancer, this thorn, this opposition that exists in our flesh still opposing God’s will. However, even this, we might wrestle with God and ask Him to remove, and we might learn to trust Him — and be satisfied that His plan is best.
2 Corinthians 12:8-10 NLT
Three different times I begged the Lord to take it away. Each time he said, “My grace is all you need. My power works best in weakness.” So now I am glad to boast about my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ can work through me. That’s why I take pleasure in my weaknesses, and in the insults, hardships, persecutions, and troubles that I suffer for Christ. For when I am weak, then I am strong.
You see, Christianity isn’t about talking to God so that we can get our own way. It isn’t about learning to imitate God’s character so that we can strive harder to look holy and righteous to other people.
We are messengers called to trust God’s message and purpose to come through. Even when we are still making all of the mistakes we make, we point to God and say “He has done these wonderful things for me to bless me”.
Genesis 33:5 NLT
Then Esau looked at the women and children and asked, “Who are these people with you?” “These are the children God has graciously given to me, your servant,” Jacob replied.
Harold J. Ballinger 