Readings:
Genesis 40, 41
Matthew 14
Proverbs 2
I was convicted by Pastor Russ’s sermon on January 19th at 4 Points Church to remember what God has done and to be willing to fail more and to be willing to be proven a fool for the glory of God:
https://www.facebook.com/share/v/1AoKBbuhPF/
And it inspired me to search for a lesson I had posted years ago by Google searching for “walking on water site:hballinger.com”:
https://hballinger.com/2018/09/25/human-effort-accomplishes-nothing/
All of this got me thinking about things I used to do more regularly (that I would testify was the Lord doing amazing things very different from what I used to do on my own):
- Post daily devotionals/ bible studies
- Anonymous prayer walks around and through area hospitals
- Anonymous prayer walks around and through areas of homelessness, drugs and poverty
- Anonymous Bible study and prayer time around and inside strip clubs and other places that were familiar to me in my foolish, darker days
- Visit area churches anonymously to encourage them and to know how to pray for them and give an honest recommendation to anyone who might live close to them
- Lead weekly Bible studies inside the jail cell block
- Preach and teach with my life as often as I could, and use a pulpit when necessary
- Share worship, messages of faith, and speak openly about foolish vs wise and good vs wicked publicly (even to the point of facing very real consequences in career, friends, and places of worship)
And all of this bold, “Send me, I will go” and “Lord, if it is you, command me to come to you on the water” activity led me through amazing times of miraculous awe and wonder — then quite abruptly into a wilderness season of grieving for the loss of dealy departed loved ones who were such powerful prayer warriors and wise counsel for me, COVID, and career change. I have been mostly in isolation, being fed by the ravens, listening for the still, quiet voice of the Lord — and sometimes letting my frustration and doubt tempt me to wander like a sheep, as if I were a ship with no rudder. But His hand never left hiding me, even in the darkest hours.
So now, I am starting something new. And I’m seeking and listening to the wise counsel that I can muster around me who hasn’t yet abandoned this old fool. And I’m not as afraid of the storm as I once was, but I’m still renewing my strength in Him. So if you see me step out but take my eyes off of Him and do under the waves — please don’t berate me from inside the boat. I’m just offering Him the opportunity to show up and show out, so please see what He is doing that is amazing, don’t just focus on this old fool making expected mistakes.
At times, I may have turned you away, offended you, or forgotten you during this time — and I’m sorry, my friends. But as much and often as I fail you, He will never fail you. So I urge you to also make Him a better friend than I can be on my own.
Thank you Jesus!
If you need help, prayer, healing, assistance, etc. please consider joining the Bible Plan we are reading in the YouVersion Bible App:
Bible in a Year: 365-Day Reading Plan http://bible.com/r/4×4
We started the plan on January 1st, but anyone can join in with us at any point along the way.
Join our Teams meeting to interact live each morning at 6:00AM Eastern:
Join the meeting now
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Harold J. Ballinger 