Yesterday at work, I reacted poorly to a public accusation made that I had ignored something.

I have been working hard for months to prevent a lack of equipment resources to affect our customers while we waited for new equipment to arrive and be added to meet the needs. It has been a daily effort of shifting things around to try and prevent any service issues. I cant even leave the automated systems in place that usually assist with these things around the clock because the resources are so low that they create more problems than help as they will “go wild” attempting to shift things around. So my life for months has been high stress, trying to keep things running smoothly, even under this heavy strain of challenges.

I have said these things to you, that in me you may have peace. In the world you will have tribulation. But take heart; I have overcome the world.”
John 16:33 ESV
http://bible.com/59/jhn.16.33.ESV

Then, yesterday, when an email came out publicly to the group, accusing me of ignoring an alert – I responded sharply with the truth and the evidence of what I had been doing to work on the issue. And I pointed out that I had a list and a plan in place that I had been working to carefully handle the issue as best I could. But it was not a kind or gentle response. The stress of family members’ health concerns this week and my level of frustration at work had built up to the point that I was not quick to listen and slow to speak. I responded sharply.

Know this, my beloved brothers: let every person be quick to hear, slow to speak, slow to anger; for the anger of man does not produce the righteousness of God. Therefore put away all filthiness and rampant wickedness and receive with meekness the implanted word, which is able to save your souls.
James 1:19-21 ESV
http://bible.com/59/jas.1.19-21.ESV

I could sit back and justify my frustration, by saying that I’ve asked for help and for necessary resources for years and that it is only now as I’m being transitioned to a new role that resources are being put in place. I can see that three people will now be sharing the responsibilities of what I have been doing by myself and I could let that become the source of bitterness and pride over the heavy load that has been on my shoulders. I could look at equipment finally being purchased and put in place to meet the needs as I’m ushered into another role and let it result in bitterness and pride over the hours of extra hours of extra on call work battling these challenges. Or I could be grateful that the trial is over and that the people coming to replace me won’t have it as bad as I did.

Romans 12:12 ESV
Rejoice in hope, be patient in tribulation, be constant in prayer

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But I’ll admit, sometimes I get distracted and I allow myself to react to the challenges of this world instead of remaining grateful and mindful of the path that I have set before me. I’m so glad that I have an advocate in Christ who can not only forgive me, but cut out that bitterness and replace it with forgiveness. One who can teach me about His joy so that I can be strong enough to forgive. One who can remind me of my many imperfections so that I might not be quite as condescending, prideful, and judgemental towards others. One who can teach me to love and respect even those who I might think are coming against me.

James 1:12 ESV
Blessed is the man who remains steadfast under trial, for when he has stood the test he will receive the crown of life, which God has promised to those who love him.

I’ve been able to bear the load. And my last employer had to replace me with two new people when I left, each making more than I made at the time. And it won’t surprise me if it’s the case again in this circumstance. But shouldn’t I be happy that I was able to offer a great benefit of work provided to my employers – and shouldn’t it stop there? Shouldn’t I be grateful that the Lord gifted me with the abilities that He has and leave it at that? Why must I fall into pride, letting myself listen to those voices pointing out so many things that are “wrong” or “unfair” about the circumstances.

1 Peter 5:10 ESV
And after you have suffered a little while, the God of all grace, who has called you to his eternal glory in Christ, will himself restore, confirm, strengthen, and establish you.

Yes, the struggle is real.

Help us, Lord.

Bondservants, obey in everything those who are your earthly masters, not by way of eye-service, as people-pleasers, but with sincerity of heart, fearing the Lord. Whatever you do, work heartily, as for the Lord and not for men, knowing that from the Lord you will receive the inheritance as your reward. You are serving the Lord Christ. For the wrongdoer will be paid back for the wrong he has done, and there is no partiality.
Colossians 3:22-25 ESV
http://bible.com/59/col.3.22-25.ESV

Remind me that I’m working heartily for you, Lord.

Bondservants, obey your earthly masters with fear and trembling, with a sincere heart, as you would Christ, not by the way of eye-service, as people-pleasers, but as bondservants of Christ, doing the will of God from the heart, rendering service with a good will as to the Lord and not to man, knowing that whatever good anyone does, this he will receive back from the Lord, whether he is a bondservant or is free. Masters, do the same to them, and stop your threatening, knowing that he who is both their Master and yours is in heaven, and that there is no partiality with him.
Ephesians 6:5-9 ESV
http://bible.com/59/eph.6.5-9.ESV

Proverbs 22:29 ESV
Do you see a man skillful in his work? He will stand before kings; he will not stand before obscure men.

Proverbs 13:4 ESV
The soul of the sluggard craves and gets nothing, while the soul of the diligent is richly supplied.

Psalm 128:2 ESV
You shall eat the fruit of the labor of your hands; you shall be blessed, and it shall be well with you.